Annie XX: Testing

Annie XX: Testing

(Chronological index: Ray/Denise Married, Met Ruth)

Ray walked into the biggest company conference room, the one they used to roll out new product. It looked like everyone had been invited to the meeting.

But instead of an animatronic robot on the stage, there was just a guy in a suit, a table and some folders.

There was an ineffable quality of government about them that set Ray's teeth on edge. He took a seat near the exit.

After everyone was seated, the company president closed the door and walked to the stage.

"Hey, everyone!" he said. "I have wonderful news. We're in the running for a very, very special contract. It's very exciting."

"What is it?" Jean asked from the front row.

"Can't tell you!" he said happily. "There are…Security Concerns." Ray got ready to stand up. "The US Navy is involved in the contract. Okay, the whole government is, but the Navy has the responsibility for… Well. I can't tell you that, either.

"Thing is, everyone here gets a Background Investigation. It's part of the security clearances we'll need for everyone that has anything to do with the project.

"Now, most of you will probably not have a problem with the BI." He gestured towards the table. "For some of you, there are concerns." Ray's stomach dropped a few stories.

"If you don't pass the clearance, we're not going to fire you. We will find something for you to do, maybe maintaining one of our long-term contracts."

Great, Ray thought. I get to wander around theme parks cleaning robots. He stood and walked smoothly towards the door.

"Foster?" Mr. Wise called. "Where are you going?"

"I have a premonition, sir. I don't think the FBI is going to have a problem figuring out that I own a sylph. And we all know the clearance level of anyone with a pet sylph."

"Ah. Well, actually, Mr. Cross here already has a file started on you."

A file. Ray started to head for the door again. But then…

-----

"But then you wanted to know what was in your file," Annie said.

"Exactly," Ray said. He scooped ice cream into the sylphs' bowl. Pet shoveled a spoonful of sprinkles over it.

"So what was in it?" Denise asked. She poured syrup over her sundae, then held it over the sylph bowl. The three tiny women nodded enthusiastically.

"Well," Ray said, "the State Department started it."

"Alaska?" Annie asked.

"Yeah. There's some nice things about you and me. The NCIS agent-"

"Not FBI?" Buttercup asked.

"No. It's a Navy project. Anyway, the NCIS agent spent five minutes on Poultry."

"You had chicken for lunch?" Denise asked.

"No," Annie said. "The sylph we escorted back was a professor of poultry related science. Poultry was his name."

"And the agent had a hard time understanding that," Ray said. "Then when he did, it was a hard time for him to accept it.

"Anyway, then we had to talk about Brent."

"Oh," Pet said. Denise and Ray turned to look at her.

"You know about Brent?" Ray asked.

"Annie told me about her first time. And the Sylph Liberation."

"Yep. That's what got the Secret Service's attention. He wrote a letter to the President. Let's see. I was arrested for starting a bar fight in college."

"You were?" Annie asked. "When was that?"

"After Deliah broke up with us. The bar owner was a friend of hers, knew me, dropped the charges. But it was still in the report." He gazed at the wall for a second. "Oh, and they were concerned that I was a registered supporter of Sylph Rescue."

"That bothers them?" Buttercup asked, shocked.

"That and a recent purchase of a whack-ton of sylph-sized camping goods and supplies," he replied.

"Oh," Pet said again. She glanced at the window in the direction of Kelly's band of sylphs. "What did you tell him?"

"That my sylphs are hard on the furniture." He stood to wash his bowl, collecting his wife's on the way past.

"So?" Annie asked. "Are you cleared or not? What have you heard about this big project?"

"So, no word yet and nothing. No one's heard anything, and they're not going to until everyone's cleared."

"Huh," Annie grunted. "What sort of secret project would welcome someone with sylphs at home?"

"Nee-ner, nee-ner," Buttercup said, echoing the Twilight Zone theme. Pet shivered.

"Don't worry," Annie said, hugging her friend. "First Coast Animatronics isn't really a brand name in the creepy evil industry."

-------

The creepy evil project progressed slowly. Ray had nothing to report except some special software being installed and some computers isolated from the internet.

There was a big change one day. Ray came home with a smile. He wouldn't explain, but never stopped smiling.

"Project started?" Denise asked.

"Yep. How about fondue for dinner?"

"So, what is the project?" Pet asked.

"Can't tell you. How much chicken do we have?"

"Not even a hint?" Buttercup asked.

"Nope. Let's get a marinade going."

"Fondue?" Annie asked. "Where are the asbestos knickers?"

Ray wouldn't talk, but after a week he stopped giggling. Almost everyone let the secrecy slide. Almost everyone.

-----

Ray was sliding across the plywood in the attic. "Where was this wasps' nest, Pet?"

"Over farther," she said from his elbow. "Way, way over."

He swung the flashlight beam over to the floor near the sylph. He didn't shine directly on her to avoid blinding her. "Exactly how did you get that far over to see the nest, Pet?"

"I was, uh, was, was," she stammered. He watched her twist on one toe for a second, looking around the dark space.

"Pet, is there a problem?" She made fists, then stepped closer to his face.

"Ray?" she whispered.

"Yes, Pet," he whispered back.

"Can I tell you a secret?"

"Anything, Pet. You can trust me."

"So can you," she said. "You can trust me with secrets."

"Ah."

"You trust me, right?"

"Pet, it's not up to me. I can't tell anyone about the confidential information they gave me."

"But you trust me, right?"

"Yes, completely."

"Then why won't you tell me?" She looked to be on the verge of tears. Ray shifted around on the dusty wood and picked her up. He stroked her hair until she relaxed a bit.

"I'm going to kill Annie," he said.

"What?"

"This has to be her idea."

"No, no," she protested. He kept on stroking her reassuringly.

"It's okay, Pet. I know you'd never ask me to break a confidence, betray my country, risk my job, end up with the five of us homeless, living out of Denise's car."

"What? Really?"

"Only Annie would keep pushing, and even then only Annie would send you to do her evil work. Maybe I should cage her for a week."

"No!" she shrieked.

"Two weeks?"

"It wasn't her idea!" She squirmed free of his grip and dropped to his shoulder. Scrambling over his sleeve, she threw herself at his chin and gripped it tight. "It was me! Just me! Don't punish Annie! Don't betray your car! We don't want to live out of Denise's country!"

"Hush, hush, hush," he cooed. He moved her to his chest, holding against his heartbeat. "It's okay. I just really can't tell anyone. I signed paperwork and everything. Understand?"

"Okay," she said softly. "I'm sorry."

"It's alright, Pet," he told her. "But I'll tell you what. When I do get to share the information? I'll tell you first."

"Really?" She smiled, sniffled and spread her arms to hug at him.

---------

Almost three months after the hardware work started, Ray asked Denise if he could take Pet to the office that day.

Everyone froze at or on the breakfast table. Ray had only rarely taken any sylph but Annie to work with him. And he'd stopped doing that because of 'security concerns.'

"Why?" Denise asked.

"Why Pet?" Annie asked.

"I made a promise," he told them both. Pet gasped.

"The one in the attic?" she asked. He nodded.

"What one in the attic?" Buttercup asked.

"See!" Pet shouted. "I CAN keep a secret."

"I know," he told her. "That's why you get to come to the office first."

Annie's head whipped around. "First?" she asked.

"I am sooooo jealous," Buttercup said, hugging her daughter.

"Yeah, me, too," Annie said slowly. Her owner winked at her. She relaxed and tried to pull the attic story out of her friend. Pet withstood all attempts, smiling from ear to itty ear.

-----

Hours later, Ray was the first one home. He put Pet down beside the sylph perch across from the TV and went upstairs to change.

"What happened?" Annie and Buttercup asked her. "What's the secret? What did you do?"

"Nuh-uh," she said. "You guys can go in tomorrow and find out. We can't talk about it outside of the building. But tomorrow, you can both go." She showed about fifty teeth in a smile. "If you want to, that is."

"I wonder if we can tickle it out of her?" Annie mused.

"It might be fun to find out," Buttercup said. Pet squealed and ran for the firemen's pole, roommates on her heels.

When Denise came home, she saw Annie first. The brunette was stalking down the kitchen hallway and held the mesh from a butterfly's net.

Buttercup was waiting by the laundry room door with a pair of stuffed cushions from the carrier.

Denise lowered her briefcase by the front door and looked for the other one. Pet shouted and ran out from behind the umbrella stand to grab her owner's ankle.

"Save me! Save me!" Denise plucked her into the air as the other two closed on them.

"Save you from what?" she asked. "Oh! And what happened at FCA?"

"She won't tell us!" Buttercup shouted.

"We were going to tickle it out of her," Annie added.

Denise looked from them to Pet. Two of her fingers curled around Pet's torso. "You mean like this?" she asked. Pet shrieked and kicked.

-----

"I'll leave you to your guide," Ray said as he put the sylphs down. They looked around. They were on a table in a conference room. Several tables were pushed against the sides of the room, covered with junk. Ray walked out.

"Okay, first we have to get dressed," Pet ordered. She started taking off her clothes. Buttercup and Annie shared a look, then started stripping.

Pet picked up rubber disks and handed them to the other two.

"What's this?" Annie asked. It was a thin but stiff sheet, almost like a trivet except that it was only about three inches across. To the sylph it was like a super-sized Frisbee.

"You'll see. Just hold it."

"You are getting rather bossy, young lady," Buttercup pointed out. Pet smiled. She was seldom the center of attention like this, and never in charge.

Her glee over her power made Annie laugh. Pet's smile faltered for a second. Annie almost explained herself, then remembered an airport conversation with Denise. She just smiled and waited for Pet to figure out what to do.

After a second the smile came back, if anything bigger than it was before.

"Okay, okay. Now, watch this." Pet held her disk with both hands, down about knee level. Then she stepped into it like she was putting on a pair of pants.

Her foot stretched out the surface, which clung to her like a coat of paint. She lifted the other foot and thrust that through, then lifted the disk up to her hips.

The material stretched across her until she finally brought her arms inside, then shoved it the last little bit. It snapped around her throat, sounding like latex gloves on a doctor drama.

Her entire body below her next was covered with the form-fitting material.

"I think I see your…belly button," Buttercup said.

"Not much better than being naked," Annie observed.

"Oh, it's much better," Pet assured them. She stepped over to a touch-screen on one side of the table. There was an intercom beside it. She pushed the button. "Ready to calibrate," she announced formally. Annie half expected a title to be used. Captain or Commander would have fit the tone.

"Go ahead," Ray's voice replied. The outline of a sylph formed in the touch screen. Pet stood in front of it and matched the thing's pose. Pet's name appeared, next to a number, 00%.

"Now watch this, you're going to do it, too." Parts of the display blinked. Pet responded by moving the body parts indicated.

Annie stepped closer and realized that the program was directing her to flex individual joints. After a few moments it had made the sylph move every part of her body through the full range of motion.

It finally blinked and the figure went out. Pet's name stayed, and the 100% number.

Buttercup dressed and calibrated next. Annie couldn't see any differences in the procedure.

When she stepped up, though, the thing said it was 'Devilsylph 00%.'

"Har, dee, har, har," she said in a monotone.

"Go ahead," Ray said once more. She cooperated, but she made a face for each movement.

After that, Pet took them to the end of the table. "Okay, there's a path."

Annie looked where Pet pointed. The tables ringing the room had a wide variety of crap on them, looking like a mad obstacle course.

Right in front of them was a set of stairs constructed out of Legos. Beyond that was an Erector set made to resemble a playground gym set.

There was a tiny moon walk, a dollhouse, a castle, a radio controlled car, a cookie sheet covered with marbles… And all of it had a dotted line laid down by a felt marker.

"Stick to the path?" Buttercup asked.

"And beware the moors," Annie muttered.

"Yeah," Pet said. "Walk or run, whatever you want. Just follow the dots."

"What if we do it wrong?" Annie asked.

"I'm not sure that we can. The suits are recording everything we do. Ray says they want a database of movement. So the more we move, the more their data is based. Um…"

"Something like that," Annie laughed. She walked forward and jumped to the next table. "You know," she said as she started up the stairs, "there are flat pieces. Pieces that cover the Lego dots, so little sylph feet can get steady purchase."

"Sorry," Ray's voice called from somewhere overhead.

"We'd better be getting paid for this," she muttered.

-------

At the last table, the three sylphs worked to construct a cabin out of Lincoln Logs. As Pet and Buttercup lifted one log to start the south wall, Annie adjusted the spacing of the base of the east one.

"Hey, Ray?" she asked the air.

"Annie?" his voice replied.

"We've got three beautiful sylphs in sexy rubber fetish wear.." They moved to the north wall. "Running around a confidence course and playing with giant toys."

"Yeah?"

"Why is this a matter of national security?"

"It's not," he said. "Not yet. This part is proprietary data, though. Which means," he went on before Pet could ask, "that it won't hurt national security, but it might hurt my company."

"Getting you fired?" Buttercup asked.

"And that would betray Denise's car!" Pet said anxiously. "We'd be carless!"

"Right," Annie said after a moment. "Well, we'd better keep it a secret, hadn't we?" Buttercup agreed and Pet slowly relaxed.

Annie flexed her fingers, watching the rubber stretch over each joint. If I knew sign language, she wondered, would the suit let me send text messages?

"Annie!" Buttercup barked. She ran to shift this end of the log on the east.

-----

Denise cornered her husband in the garage. He was adding oil to his engine when two arms slid around his ribs to hold him in a hug.

"Did you tell Pet not to share the big secret with me?" she purred.

"No. In fact, I kinda suspected that she'd tell you all about it. Once she told the other two." He shook his head. "You should have seen her. Ordering the other two around, telling them things only when they needed it, controlling the mysteries as long as she could."

He took the can back out and removed the spigot. "I think today did wonders to empower Pet." He turned around, put the can and the spigot on the workbench and hugged his wife.

"Uh huh," she muttered. "Pet's on my pillow, curled into a fetal position, crying her eyes out."

"What?"

"She spent twenty minutes explaining to me why she couldn't tell me anything. I said it was okay. She just kept on explaining. I think she's terrified of being caught between us. Rock and a hard place sort of thing?"

"Oh, god."

"You need to fix this. Now. No teasing Pet, no assumptions, no forgetting that Pet isn't Annie."

"Right, right," he muttered. "Okay. Well, I'll tell her she can tell you."

"Which she might think was a test?"

"Oh. Um. Oh. OH! We'll tell her it WAS a test!"

----

Ray pressed his hand into the pillow right behind the catatonic sylph. Pet rolled into his palm but didn't move.

"Pet? Pet, you shouldn't feel bad. You passed the test! You did good! Now I know I can trust you completely!" He rubbed her back gently, glancing over at his wife every so often.

"I already told Denise the big secret. So you can tell her all about your two days at the office."

"I can?" she whispered.

"Of course you can," he promised.

"What did you look like in the tight suit?" Denise asked. "What did it feel like to wear it?"

"Warm," she replied. She started to stretch a little bit, wiping at her tears. Ray handed her over to her owner and left the room. Pet's voice rose as she spoke, enthusiastically describing her part of the creepy evil secret project. Whatever it was.

-----

Ray stood in the driveway, waving as Denise drove off. One hand sheltered Annie's pocket from the wind and rain as she waved, too.

"So, three days alone," she said as they turned and went back inside.

"Not quite," he said as he walked carefully back inside. Kelly's people were avoiding Tropical Storm Kissy by camping in the living room. Ray was keeping an extra careful eye out for itsy bitsy sylph kids.

He relaxed as he climbed the stairs. He'd removed the ladders the family sylphs used, so no kids could wander into that territory.

Annie was surprised when he went into the bedroom. He didn't put her down, but started getting ready for work.

"It's Saturday, revered Master," she pointed out. "Why are you getting your badge and office keys? Did you forget it was the weekend?"

"Nope."

"So, you left something undone at the office? This is covering your ass?"

"This," he said with a smile, "is an opportunity." He put a finger to his lips to indicate silence.

"This is the evil secret creepy project?" she whispered. He nodded. "Wicked," she replied.

------

The drive to the office was like something out of a disaster flick. Trees were down, lines sparked and the roads were flooded.

"It seems to me," he muttered as he drove through a waterfilled intersection, "that the Jax city planners all lived on the beach."

"Why's that?"

"Their approach to drainage. They figure that eventually, one way or another, the tide goes out. Other than that…"

She watched a car in a parking lot disappear in a spray of water. "Could be, Master, could be."

He signed into the after-hours log, showed Annie to the guard and went someplace new. On the second floor there was an empty room.

In the exact center of the bare cement floor was a box. Ray put her down there and left the room. She examined the item.

It was about the size of a Timex watch case. "Is this the national security thingamathing?" she called. There was no answer.

She walked around it a couple of times. On one side was a small toggle switch. "Oh, har har," she said. "A giant room, empty of anything but a switch. Let's see how long Annie can stand beside a switch without throwing it to see what happens. Is that it?" There was still no response.

"Well, I'm not playing. If this is national security, the switch could start World War III or something. Or, considering the people that work here, a robot dinosaur vampire will run in and growl at poor little Annie." She made two fists and stormed away from the box.

"That's it, huh? Annie anti-poke-around-in-simple-harmless curiosity conditioning? This is all a big set up so you can jump out of nowhere and shout triumphantly? Huh?" She stalked towards the closed door. "I'm not going to participate. At all. How do you like them apples?"

Silence was the only reply. She crossed her arms and tapped a foot for a minute. "Lousy way to spend a Saturday, teasing your best friend." She stared at the door, the lights, the outlets. At the box.

When she threw the switch, she wasn't really surprised that the box burst open, panels falling around her. She was a bit surprised by the action figure.

It was almost exactly her height, shaped like a male. There was no face, just a camera lens and a speaker. The skin was a matte black surface, kind of rubbery to the touch.

The articulation looked to very faithful to a human or sylph form. She tried to move one arm but it appeared to be locked in place.

"Are you going to start a muffled plea for an oil can?" she asked it.

"No," Ray's voice came from the figure. "I was waiting for the software to load." One arm stretched out and offered her its hand.

Strains of her favorite Captain and Tennille song started to play from somewhere in the ceiling. "Can I have this dance?"

"Oh, Ray," she whispered.

She had questions but those would wait until after the dance. Annie put her head on his shoulder and swayed with him. He was a bit stiff but at least he didn't step on her toes.

They hugged for a minute after the music finally faded. "This is what the Navy wanted? A sylph surrogate?"

"Kinda," he admitted. They let go and he started walking around the room. She watched his every move. He was and wasn't Ray. She wasn't sure if the change in his mannerisms was real or just that he was small enough she was seeing him differently.

"The goal was a unit that could go anywhere a sylph could, do anything a sylph could. And minimal detection." He walked towards the wall. She tagged along behind.

"And how did we fit in?" Annie asked. "Me and Pet and Buttercup, and the construction sets?"

"Well, the song we danced to wasn't an accident." He found a small crack in the cement and knelt to examine it. Then he looked up at the ceiling. There was a low whistle."

"Seventies slow dancing pop rock for a robot spy?" she asked.

"No, no. You taught me to dance to that song." He stood and faced her for a second. From his body language, she almost could see that he was smiling. It was weird the way her mind used his posture and voice and painted his face on that lens. "You moved, I moved to copy. There were problems."

"I was a girl teaching a guy how to lead. And I didn’t have a partner. Nor did you."

"Exactly. Well, I'm a full sized human trying to control a sylph sized robot. There are problems."

"Wait," she said, holding up one hand. They drifted closer to the wall. "Okay, lengths are 1/12th of the original. Surface areas are 1/12 of 1/12th of the original. Mass is 1/12 of 1/12 of 1/12th of the original. Not exactly straightforward math, depending on how faithful the robot is going to be."

"That's part of it," he said. "You guys don't move the same way we do."

"You have noticed my ass!" she said cheerfully.

"Daily," he assured her. "Anything else?"

"Well, my muscle to mass ratio means I can perform actions humans can't replicate." She swung her arms and jumped completely over the figure. He spun to watch her land, then jumped. He went straight up, about as high as she had, but without quite as graceful a landing.

"Yep. That's it exactly. Anyway, I'm not controlling the robot."

"You could fool me. That's a Ray Foster slouch if I ever saw one."

"Well, yeah, but… I'm actually controlling a virtual human in a computer. And there's a virtual sylph trying to copy that human's movements.

"And there's a database of sylph bodies in motion that help the computer figure out what a sylph would do to do the same thing that I want to do. THAT computer controls the robot."

"And I'm the database!" she said.

"Yes. You and the others. If there's nothing on file that's remotely similar, I get a straightforward response." They reached the wall. Ray's remote started feeling along the surface. "If there's anything close, though, it uses that to put a little English on the articulation."

"Uh huh," she said. "But we never danced. You weren't all that wooden over there."

"You never danced," he said. "Pet did."

"She never told me! That little weasel!"

"I told her it was a surprise for you."

"That darling!"

"Hey, Annie?"

"What?"

"This wall feels soft."

She joined him and touched where he was feeling. "It's wet. Must be a leak somewhere. With all this rain, there's probably a small pool on the roof."

They looked up at the ceiling. Just in time to see it give way. Plaster, leaves and dark water swept down from overhead. The wall collapsed like an oatmeal sculpture and they were swept into darkness.

Annie was aware of sliding, rolling and falling, all in darkness. The first time she saw something to focus on, it was the loading dock door. One panel hung askew and the flood was flowing around it.

She'd made it to the first floor somehow and the rushing water was taking her out to the parking lot.

An eddy bowled her over on the loading ramp. She sputtered when she made it back to the surface. She was having a hard time staying there. "RAY!" she screamed as she swept past the door.

The parking lot behind the building was a vast, black lake, churning in the wind and rain. She turned around, trying to find the nearest shore. In the gloom, though, she couldn't tell where safety lay.

"Annie!" She turned to see something bearing down on her. The flat, dirty white face looked like an iceberg. "Grab hold!" Ray's voice shouted.

"Grab hold to what?" she shouted, trying to swim out of the thing's way. A raindrop hit her right on top of her head and dunked her.

When she fought her way back up, the thing had floated past her. In the back she saw Ray's little figure. He had both hands thrust into the side and was kicking to push it through the water.

She realized it was Styrofoam, probably packing for a computer. He stopped kicking as she swam over to his side, pulled one hand free. "Get on, we'll float this out."

"Why don't you just come get me!?"

"Let's get you safe first," he said. "I'll explain." He pointed at the foam. "Can you push your hands into this?"

"I doubt it," she said. She reached for the hole he'd made. Little Ray suddenly ducked underwater. A hand under her ass pushed her straight up into the air. The end of the packing dipped down in reaction to the thrust.

She grabbed the edge as it went by and swung herself over. The molded space was about knee-deep in water, but at least she could stand and breathe easily. The rain drops were battering her from the side so she crouched in the water, trying to gain shelter.

Ray clambered over the side to join her. He immediately punched a hole in the side and the water started to drain out. Without pausing, he crawled over the side again, headed towards the other end of the packing form.

"What are you doing?" she asked. The black form against the white foam was easy to follow, but it was too dark to see quite what he was doing.

There was a popping sound. She realized he was tearing up their raft. Another drop hit her on the side of the head and bounced her face off of the foam. She ducked back down, holding her face in her hands. She probed her mouth gently, trying to tell if she'd bitten the end of her tongue off.

Then the rain stopped. She looked up. Ray was tucking a ragged panel of foam over the depression they were sitting in. It didn't quite cover the whole thing, but it was keeping the rain off of her.

"Thanks," she said. He settled down next to her, blocking her from the weather as much as possible.

"You okay?"

"No, Ray. I'm adrift on a parking lot that empties into a sewer that empties into a river that reaches the sea in about ten miles. And a hurricane-"

"Tropical storm," he corrected.

"At my size," she shrieked, "what's the fucking difference?!" The foam rocked under them as she slapped at the side.

"Sorry," he said.

"Don't be sorry, just come get me! Us! Come get me and your expensive little toy."

"I… Annie, if I get out of the tank, I can't reestablish a link to this unit. You'll… I won't have any way to call you and ask you where you are. So by the time I get some pants on and get downstairs and wade out here, you might be anywhere.

"Well, send someone else."

"There's no one else here. That's part of the reason I did this today. So we could dance…"

"Touching," she sneered. "Wait, doesn't this thing have some sort of tracking system? Something you could follow?"

"No. The government wanted it to be stealthy. No transponders."

"GPS?"

"Next version."

"Well…well… Well, aren't you in contact with this unit? Triangulate that signal!"

"It's too stealthy," he said. "Piggybacks on a cellphone system. I'm not sure what all it does, but the guys in Pensacola swear it's undetectable."

"Ducky," she spat. They sat together for a moment. She shivered in the cold, but at least the last of the water was draining away. Ray's remote was channeling any new rain towards his drain. Another couple of days and her clothes would maybe become only moist.

"There is good news," he said after a moment.

"What?"

"Well, the sewers are all overfull. There's no way this thing'll get sucked down into them."

"Wonderful," she said. The foam spun and rocked through the evening.

--------

Ray stood and looked around every so often, but was unable to determine their location or course.

Annie tried to help once. "Maybe you're just not used to the perspective," she said. He held her firmly in place as she tried to stand and scan the area.

All she saw was wind-whipped water and heavy rain. There were headlights as a truck passed but the spray from his tire swamped their little raft.

At least it shoved them up over the curve. She held tight to Ray's remote form as they skidded across an unkempt lawn to come to rest in the relative shallows.

They looked up at the dimly lit outline of a dark, abandoned house.

"It'll be out of the rain," he said.

"Hope no rats, cats or hobos have the same idea," she countered. He shrugged, which came out as a sort of jointed-stutter, and hopped over the side. She slid down to join him.

The water came up to her chin when it was at rest, and it was almost never at rest.

"I don't breathe," Ray said, offering a piggyback. "Well, I do, but that's all in the tank. Somewhere."

She climbed on and held his throat tightly. "At least you don’t have to worry about choking me," he said as he started to slog through the grass.

"Worry? That's my new goal," she muttered into his audio pickup. He sighed and stamped onwards.

"I'm in charge," she said after a moment. "I'm the one-"

"You're the one with actual sylph experience," he replied. I'm perfectly willing to follow your lead, your orders, your example on this."

"Um… Well, okay then," she said with a nod.

The sidewalk was only knee-deep. She slid down and ran for the front steps. He followed. She crouched and leapt up for the edge. He jumped all the way up and reached down to lift her.

She allowed him to throw her over the next three steps, then they were on the porch. Two feet in, the fury of the storm was noticeably lessened. It was still a nightmare, but not directly lethal.

Annie led the way to the front door. "Closed," he said. "Probably locked, maybe barricaded. The windows are all in covered in plywood, probably hurricane protection."

She ignored him and scanned the door. They were lucky. "There's a mail slot! We get up there, we're in!"

"Fastball special?" he asked.

"Not until your aim improves," she said.

"I got you up the stairs okay," he protested. She walked towards the edge of the doorway and he followed.

"All you had to do was not slam me into the next step. This would be a bit more exacting." She found the jamb along one side. The paint was chipped and cracked. There was a space between the slats.

"Can you pry this off the doorway?" she asked. He flattened his hand and thrust it in the crack. With a few pops the slat came free of the frame. Rusted brads came free of the old wood slowly but surely.

"This isn't going to make it easier to open the door," he said.

"Not opening the door," she said. "Just making a ramp." There was a gunshot-snap overhead and the slat came free. Ray staggered back when the resistance stopped, then worked the slat around to the mail slot. It was steep but climbable.

Annie scurried up like a squirrel as he held it in place. She worked the cover open and slid inside. "Come on up," she said as she held the cover open. He jumped and grabbed the sill, pulling himself through. She let the cover drop and they rolled into the house.

Sprawled on the floor in the dark interior, Annie just lay and enjoyed the strange sensation of not-being-rained-on. Ray made his figure stand and look around the room.

She left the gloom to the stealthy sylph surrogate and breathed deeply.

"We need to start you a fire," Ray said. He pointed through the murkiness. "Old packing papers there, a fireplace over there. Um… Oh, there's kindling."

He walked away. Away into the darkness. Leaving her alone in the darkness. She rolled to her feet and ran after him. "Ray! Annie's in charge, Ray! Don't abandon your liege lady!"

Ray tossed or levered some bits of wood up to the hearth. Annie dragged them into the fireplace. "What are these?" she asked.

"Leftovers from boarding the place up," he guessed. There was a cardboard box of materials in one corner. Or so he said, she didn't follow him through the murk.

He came back with twists of yellowed paper. They packed that into the grate under the wood. Without warning, Ray leapt up into the air. There was a metallic scraping sound in the shadows above. Then the dark figure dropped out of the greater darkness. "Chimney flue," he said.

Finally Ray removed his hand and held the exposed contacts near the paper. He paused. "With your permission?"

"Granted," she said in her best Queen Victoria imitation. "And hurry the fuck up." The contacts sparked and the humid paper smoldered. It finally caught and they moved slowly back. The flames licked at the scrap plywood.

"How much power do you have in that thing?" she asked. "I mean, how many hours of operation did you just spend on the fire?"

"I'm still good for a couple of days," he said. "Come here." He held out his arms and she moved into his hug.

There was still no body heat coming off of him, but he was insulating the side away from the fire. She turned now and again, exposing her wettest side to the fire.

"I'm sorry about this," he said after a while. She pulled away enough to look him straight in the lens and smiled.

"Oh, Ray. You should be." She put hugged him and put her head on his shoulder. "I'm gonna make you paaaaaaaay…."

He did the shoulder-stutter thing. "Whatever makes you happy," he said. "You've earned it."

"It's not all bad," she said after a moment. "At least I get to boss you around."

"Yes, milady. What is your pleasure?"

"I'd say food, but the only thing in here is probably roast haunch of mouse."

"Probably."

"Hmm. So, stealthy? You're a sylph sized spybot?"

"The specs say counterintelligence," he said. "Which leads to a design that's perfect for spying, but leaves wiggle room for deniability."

"Of course." She pushed him back a step. "I'm getting a little too warm. Why doesn't the government just train sylphs? Oh, wait," she said holding up a hand. "The government doesn't trust sylphs."

"Nope. As long as your spies can go out of sight and have secret meetings with the enemy, you'll never be sure they're not the enemy."

"That's stupid. Real spies can go off the grid. Real spies have gone off the grid! People are people!"

"Yep. But with this system, there's a digital record of everything done."

"And who's going to go through every hour of recorded mission records?" she asked.

"Not my area," he said. "We build it, they figure out how to use it."

"That's not very responsible!" she said, tapping his chest with a pointy finger.

"Annie, think about this. I expect that this unit is going to be sent into dangerous places. Places that would be lethal for a sylph. Sending this in the sylph's place keeps sylphs safe."

"Say that three times fast," she muttered.

"That. That. That," he replied. She poked him again. "Besides, the only way any government would trust a sylph counter-spy would be if he was brainwashed or they held his wife or kid as a hostage."

"True," she muttered. "So, I guess that this system is making the world safe for democracy? A democracy that exploits sylphs?"

"It's keeping the sylph-exploiters safe from the evil forces that include sylph-deniers, sylph-executors and those that see our society as oppressed by sylph-friendly-apostates."

"Right," she muttered. She walked across the stone tiles of the hearth and looked around. After a moment she found the sweet spot where the heat of the fire met the chill of the tiles and kept her cozy.

She sat there and patted the space next to her. "Siddown, Sylph Surrogate, and keep me company."

"If it's okay with you, I thought I'd look around, see if I could find an address…"

"Oooh, that meets with our royal approval. Go, Sir O'Gate, and effect our rescue."

"Sir O'Gate?" he muttered. "Good one." He leapt to the floor and wandered away.

--------

Annie woke to the sound of another piece of wood landing in the fire. Ray's robot was standing near the blaze, watching.

She rolled to sit up and realized she was chilled. "Hey! I command some heat! Go hit the thermostat!"

"I can't quite do that," he said. "But…." The figure walked over and sat beside her. The insulation covering him had soaked up a bit of heat from the fire. She crawled into his lap and nuzzled the warmth.

"I'm sorry, Ray."

"You? What the hell for?"

"You wanted a fun afternoon playing with your sylph. Seeing the world from my point of view. Sharing something special. Right?" He nodded. "Well, right now? Body heat is pretty special." He closed his arms around her, bands of heat that permeated her muscles. "Ahhhh. That's the stuff."

He started giving her a backrub. She'd had more than a few from him. But those were all the gentle but firm application of fingertip to major muscle groups. He'd never worked her shoulder with his thumbs before.

"Oooh, sailor," she purred. "Rub me like that, me love you long time." He paused. She squirmed a but under his grip but he didn't move. "That would be on a not-to-interfere-with-the-marriage basis, of course."

He finally started again. She started to melt. He eventually eased her to the floor, her head pillowed on his thigh.

"I, uh. I found a shipping label and an old electricity bill in a corner of the closet," he said. "I think… I think I can find this place."

"Think?"

"It's dark, still raining, but I think I know what road we're on. And a street address."

"So you can come get me. And your toy."

"I think. I just… Well, it's up to you."

"What's up to me?"

"Do you want me to leave now? Or wait for morning? Or… wait for someone else to come in on Monday?"

"That's up to you, Ray."

"Nope," he said. His head shook. "If I unplug, you're the one that's going to be alone in here. And if I can't find the place, you're the one that's going to be on your own." He stroked her hair with one hand. "It is entirely up to you."

"I trust you, Ray," she said. "Come get me."

"Are you sure?"

"Oh! If you can't find this house? Go home and get Willy. His people can search for me. Or figure out something."

"That's a thought," he said. He sounded distracted. "Okay. Okay. Well, here I go. See you in about half an hour."

"Half an hour," she said. The LED beside his speaker blazed for a second, then faded away. "Half an hour," she repeated softly. "Or I will find you…and I will kill you."

"I knew it," Ray said calmly. "You have no faith in me." Annie screamed and rolled out of his lap. She stood, spun and kicked his inhuman head as hard as she could.

He fell flat and stayed there. She stood near him, fists clenched, breathing rapidly. After a long silence she started to relax again. "Fucker," she panted softly. "But I have to admire your timing."

She could only hope he'd equally appreciate her revenge.

--------

Annie thought that morning arrived before Ray did. Between the weather and the boarded windows it was hard to be sure, but the gloom appeared a little less murky.

She kicked Little Ray over the edge of the hearth, then started dragging him across the floor. She was tucking him into the corner of the entryway when there was a knock on the door.

"Clear?" Big Ray asked. She made sure that she wasn't in the way of the door's swinging.

"Clear!" she shouted. There was a thump. The door shook violently, vibrations coming through her feet. But it didn't move. "Still clear!" she reported cheerfully.

There was a growl outside, then another thud. The door popped open, dim light and Ray burst inside. Ray tripped and fell, then lay sprawled across the floor. He was covered with mud. Annie glanced out the door to see deep tracks leading across the sodden front lawn.

Then she ran to his head. She stood on tiptoe to kiss him on the cheek. "My HERO!" she said, plastering herself across his face. Then she skipped back a step and looked in his eyes. "Tell me you brought food?"

-----

Annie sat in the passenger seat, picking through a Hardee's breakfast biscuit. Ray let her have the whole thing to herself, although she did offer bites to Little Ray from time to time. He lay flat and disinterested, so she shrugged and continued eating.

The soda was Ray's, although he did lift her to take a sip whenever she asked. She was leaning over the rim, drinking from her cupped hands when he drove into First Coast Animatronics' parking lot.

"Lemme see!" she asked. He lifted her up to the dashboard. It had stopped raining, although the wind still whipped along. Water stretched in gigantic puddles across the lot.

Work crews were busy on the loading dock. She saw two guys pushing a cart full of hot air blowers inside, others slinging soggy carpeting to the side.

Ray pulled into a relatively dry, or at least not fully submerged space and reached for his sylph. "Cheezit!" he said suddenly and shifted her sandwich over the remote.

Annie saw Ray's supervisor scurrying out the front door, coming in their direction. She tried to look innocent, then realized she'd done nothing wrong in the last two days.

Joseph looked terrified as he ran towards them. Ray picked up Annie and stood patiently.

"Ray! Thank god! We've got… We've got a problem."

"Holes in the roof, holes in the walls, holes in the floors?" Ray replied. "I'd say one or two."

"No, no, no! We secured the tank and we secured the software, but we can't find the remote!"

"Oh. I have it," Ray said calmly. He reached into the car and brought it out. "I was doing some work when the sky fell in. It seemed like the most important part that I could keep secure by taking it in my pocket."

"Oh." Annie thought that Joe was going to faint. "We were so sure…"

"I should have told security, but they had their hands full as I was walking out. And I wasn't sure what they're cleared to know?"

"No, no, it's okay. I mean, as long as you have it." Joseph took the figure and turned to go back inside the building. "I'm not sure how the Navy would handle that, but… Well, as long as nothing got lost, it should be okay." He jogged back to the front door.

"I'm going to go home and sleep for about a day and a half," Ray said, getting back in the car.

"Maybe," Annie said. He lifted an eyebrow at her as he placed her back beside the biscuit, but she said nothing else.

--------

Ray stayed on the first floor just long enough to be sure Kelly's group didn't need anything. Then he stumbled up to his bedroom.

He shared a quick shower with his sylph, the water set hot enough to make instant coffee. Annie pointed out that his yawn was big enough to sublet, then went into her drawer.

Ray was suspicious about how agreeable she was being, but too tired to spend time on the mystery. He remained awake only long enough to get under the covers.

-------

"Ray!" Annie wailed. He lifted his head and scanned the room. Nothing noticeable was happening so he looked for the time. He'd been asleep for about two hours.

Annie's head poked out of her drawer. She was crying. "What is it?" he asked.

"I had a nightmare. All alone in a haunted house. The darkness, Ray. The dark was coming for me."

"Urh," he said. He climbed out of bed and scooped up his pet. "What would help you get back to sleep without nightmares?" he asked.

"Rock me?" she asked, lower lip aquiver. He sat down in the easy chair next to the bay window. He cuddled Annie to his chest, next to his heart and started to rock.

"How's that?"

"That's nice," she said. "Would you tell me a story?"

"Urm. Is this sincere or revenge?"

"Does it make a difference?" she asked in a little-girl voice.

"I suppose not," he said. "Once upon a time, there was a beautiful woman who worked for the CIA. Major Anastasia Find. She was on a mission in a foreign country-"

"Paris."

"She was on a mission in Paris when she met her partner for the effort. James Bond. They were briefed by M and sent off to infiltrate a casino owned by the evil Doctor Knowitall."

"Oooh, I hate him."

"Everyone does. Now, they had just established their fake identities at the casino when everything changed. Anastasia shrank right on the casino floor."

"The Major became a minor!"

"That's right…Now, Bond's cover quickly took possession of the CIA agent. But under French law-"

------

When the rest of the family returned from Denise's purchasing trip, they found the house in slight disarray.

Kelly's people had moved back outdoors, but there were still bits of trash left here and there.

The coffee pot was full but cold and a pile of muddy clothing sat in the laundry room. The guest towel was missing.

"Ray changed in the bathroom?" Pet wondered. "Ray never changes in the bathroom."

"Must have been a hell of a party," Buttercup observed.

"Ray?" Denise called. His car was in the driveway so he had to be home. She jogged up the stairs, sylphs sitting on her shoulders, and found her husband.

He sat in the recliner, leaning back so far he was nearly horizontal, wearing only his robe. Annie was curled up on his chest, lashed in place with the robe's terry-cloth belt. One of his hands lay protectively curled over her.

They snored in synch. It wasn't quite in unison, a sylph breathing at a human's slow rate would suffocate. But every other breath Annie took started when the chest under her rose.

Denise smiled at the scene, then tiptoed out to go get her suitcases.



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