Annie LXXXIV: Trap Tripped

(Chronological index: New World Order 20)

Happy's attempted theft was a trap. But it took a while to notice.

Progress on the Amendment for the Provisions of Rationality proceeded slowly. The Fosters continued to make preparations for the New NEW World.

Dorre had announced that there would be two plans to use the devas that had committed to working in America.

Kadhaa wanted stability to raise her son, or as much as she could get. Federal lands in Montana were dedicated to a large permanent trash holding and converting complex. Kadhaa and about 75% of all efreets would be supported there.

Arobaini had no family ties, beyond apparently sharing Kadhaa and Amelia's heritage. She and a custom-built bus would travel between the states. Each state would be responsible for creating their own recycling station.

The traveling devafreet force would visit each state in succession. During their two-week stay, they would convert trash at one station. States that built more than one could only get one visited on each tour, but they could choose which one.

"When and if more devas become available," Dorre promised, "they can be slotted into either program. Implementation will be monitored and necessary changes made after an annual review."

Amelia was still dedicated to the rights of the Offsized. She did promise that once those were solved, or looked to be solved, she would be glad to tour and meet people and solve their trash problems.

Ray was accused of some sort of insider deal when it was revealed that he had purchased huge tracts of the lands just outside of the ones earmarked for the Montana complex.

He shrugged and waved his Ouija board. "My estate planners are willing to testify in any court that suit is brought in. Not sure if the testimony is legal, though."

"Show off," Annie muttered as CNN showed that clip once more. Ray shrugged and slid a piece of paper out to the middle of the table.

"Names," he said.

"Pet!" Pet shouted. Ray smiled and wrote that down.

"What did Pet just volunteer for?" Denise asked.

"The Amendment's taking longer than I expected," he explained. "So we can't really pay the people that are working for us. This is-"

"We can't pay Mildred?" Pet asked.

"Why isn't she pounding on our door with a club made from her old wheelchair?" Annie added.

"We can pay everyone with a legal identity," he said. "The offsized don't have any." He tapped the paper. "We're going to create holding companies. They'll own the sylphs and efreets and so on.

"And they'll collect the salaries people earn. And spend them as directed by the corporate identity, which is composed of everyone the corporation owns."

"Sounds complicated," Denise said.

"It's like us!" Pet said happily. "We don't own..."

"Shit," Annie provided.

"But Ray does and he takes care of us and spends what we tell him to for us! That's cool!"

"Thanks," he said with a nod. He tapped the paper again. "So, I need names for the holding companies. Nigel's drawing up the corporate papers for thirty, so each of you come up with ten-"

"Happy Corp!" Pet shouted. "Federal Furahifu!" Ray slid her a pencil lead and her wives gestured for her to go first. She ran, knelt and started writing. Annie and Denise watched over her shoulders in case she exceeded her literacy. "Cruiser Controller Co... Angel's Establishment... Mildred and Millie Productions..."

----------

The Anthonys started to spend a lot of time in court. Something about the Hippo Theft Case stank like an abandoned fish factory in Denmark. It was clear after the first hearing that it was a stalking horse for someone's agenda.

The actions were not denied, but defense counsel was quite willing to spend hours disputing any legal interpretation of the consequences.

It became about the nature of laws that dealt with sylph issues. Everyone at the Center shook their heads sadly. Someone was trying to circumvent the Amendment.

But ratification was proceeding, however slowly. Both Anthonys also showed up in state and federal legislation committees and panels, addressing issues and putting stupid rumors to rest.

"I'm sorry, Senator, but that is the best word for that concern. It's beyond stupid!"

"Miss Amelia, I understand that you're not fully in accord with that agenda-"

"What agenda? Believe me, Senator, if I or any sylph-rights supporter had the power to shrink people at will, we wouldn't have to wait for legislation to make sylphs citizens. If anything, shrinking the whole population would make sylph rights EVERYONE'S concern. A self-correcting problem, you know?"

"It has been suggested that ratifying the Amendment would be like a contract with...um-"

"The devil, Senator?"

"If you like. Giving our true names, offering our souls, signing up to give the magic permission...open ended permission?"

"Well, Senator, I've never claimed to have a contract with the Devil. But I've heard of the amount of money in your campaign chest... Maybe you know more than I do about such things."

Polls showed that things were too close to detect if the candor and humor were winning or losing converts. Or if the numbers that exchanged were roughly equal. So they had no reason to stop what they were doing.

They were, they all were confident that the Amendment really was a return to rationality, a much needed renaissance of justice. All they had to do was keep it alive until it was real.

The Amendment was proposed with a five year deadline for ratification. During that time, the Fosters visited several GPS sites on their list.

Each one turned out to be an isolated sylph colony, unaware of the law changes pending. Except for the one living in Yellowstone National Park, they all elected to come in from the cold.

Some took more persuading than others, including trips to Mildred and Tammy's university. That had been moved to Montana. It was the single largest employer in Uhuru.

The town was built in honor of Kadhaa and the opportunities her presence offered. She named it 'Freedom' in gratitude for the opportunity she'd been granted. Annie suggested that her heritage had also played a part and that the Swahili translation would give it an added depth.

An amazing number of people wrote or called the city planners to explain that they had misspelled the name of the Enterprise's communications officer.

----------

The Fosters were on another such trip when the case of Virginia Vs. Powers and Crane made it to the Supreme Court.

There, the defense changed their argument. It wasn't the sylph laws they objected to. It was the casual equating of sylph and people.

Sylphs weren't people

Happy and Furahifu were clearly sylphed. But clearly not human, either in origin or result.

And what the hell was a deva?

Every vertebrate on Earth had four limbs. Two legs and wings or four legs. Even bats just stretched skin across existing limbs to make wings.

Devas had six limbs. Rare on Earth, it was argued. So rare no one believed in Dragons. No one had fossils of Angels, either.

Wings and hands, they argued, showed that whatever it was devas were in the taxonomy, they shouldn't be grouped with humanity.

"Oh, my, fucking, God," Denise muttered in the hotel room. They all stared at the TV. "Amelia's going to be devastated."

"Amelia's going to go nuclear," Pet whispered.

"I need a hug," Annie said hoarsely. Ray scooped them all up and they continued to watch the train wreck.

The state was caught flat footed. Requests for a delay, a chance to reorganize their prepared statements, to research and address the new issue were denied.

"That fucker's got an athame under his robes," Annie said darkly, glaring at the Chief Justice.

The family had gone out to search the GPS coordinates for sylphs and come up empty. It was the first failure of the séance list. They wondered if the deliberations had an impact. Then they went back to the hotel. At 8 am local, they turned on the TV to hear the decision.

In the single most-viewed SCOTUS decision in government history, the offsized lost.

After the court's response to the state's side, there were no surprises, not really. The deliberation was suspiciously short, the decision suspiciously long and exceedingly well referenced.

"While portions of the Sylph Act must be updated to include new sizes, with new powers," the majority decided, "it cannot be responsibly held as true that someone subject to sufficient magic as to change their scale can be considered human.

"Ownership of the undersized is upheld. Transfer of ownership by means of the traditional methods of property still apply.

"And while the states may ratify the Amendment under consideration, it seems like an odd exercise, attempting to shoehorn non-humans into human identity against all evidence.

"Of course, if any of the magic restores a sylph to their proper size, making them visually indistinguishable from the natural population, they shall be recognized as human."

"How generous," Ray snarled.

"Restored?" Pet repeated in a small voice.

"Proper size," Annie snarked. "We can't legislate what 'humans' are but they can lay down what a 'proper' human looks like. Might as well get a rubber stamp and mark everyone who isn't within 10% of the national average as 'FUCKED.' Talk about a give-away."

"I can't be 'restored,' though," Pet said softly. "None of the born sylphs can. It means only the changed have a chance to get their rights back."

"Those of us that changed on The Day or soon after," Annie said with a nod. "And the bastards that got sylphed by gnomes."

Denise just curled up in Ray's armpit and cried.

It was a quiet morning in the hotel room. Depressed and disappointed people turned off the TV as the talking heads discussed the hijack of the case and the emotions behind the Amendment.

Pet was having a hard time staying positive. Annie didn't try. But she did keep quiet.

"It's alright," Ray said. "They've clearly railroaded the constitution, there. The FBI investigates, finds proof they're alchemists or under the influence, the decision's thrown out, the state is better prepared on the do-over..."

"Thanks, Ray," Denise said. "But leave the cheerleading for tomorrow."

"Okay," he agreed.

"I wanna do something!" Pet said.

"Chocolate?" Annie asked.

Pet shook her head, then stopped. "Well, yeah, on the way out. But I want to go back to the coordinates!"

"There's nothing there, Pet," Annie said...but not harshly. More like she was inviting an explanation.

"I know. But, but, but maybe we weren't in the right mind. Maybe we need to have heard this. Maybe, maybe, maybe... Oh, I don't know! I just wanna- Please?"

Ray reached over to the nightstand. He dangled the keys over Pet's head. "You want to drive?"

---------

The empty field was as empty as it ever had been. Searching up and down the length, the approach, the surroundings...nothing turned up.

As they made their way back down the dirt road to the highway, Annie pointed at a few buildings.

"A ghost town?" she asked.

"Maybe they moved?" Pet suggested.

"Then why didn't the list-" Ray started to ask. Denise cleared her throat. "Anything's possible," he said, turning the wheel.

Several decrepit buildings dotted an area with empty foundations and rotted structures. A few more modern buildings looked to still be in use. A barn, a house with laundry on a line, and a store.

"We can ask if they know anything," Ray said. "And if they sell drinks."

Annie rode his shoulder as the rest rode in his hands. He stepped inside and felt the cool draught of an air conditioner.

The store was a standard general product arrangement of small towns and isolated merchants.

Ray looked around and saw a figure at a soda counter hunched over a newspaper. He stepped close. "Hey, can we ask you a few questions?"

The figure looked up. All five people in the building gasped.

The man behind the counter gasped at each face he saw, sounding like hiccups.

Ray and Annie recognized a face, if slightly gender bent, that they'd seen in a dream they'd shared in Canada.

Pet and Denise recognized the face of the woman that had given them the snowflake obsidian. The mustache was a bit of a surprise.

"I swear to the goddess," the old guy said, "I thought she was just going to send you a dream."



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