Annie CLXI: Sylph Encounter

Annie CLXI: Sylph Encounter

(Chronological index: Following Annie XVIII: Siblings)

Ray glanced around the tent as he was cleaning. It wasn’t unusual to see teenagers standing around Annie’s coloring contests. It was unusual to see this many of them, though.

Many of the kids he could see were ones that had been coming to Foster reunions for years, and participated in Annie’s contests. Some hung out each year to hear her judgments and lectures. This year they were mostly gathering at the end.

While he was cleaning up discarded cartoons, Denise was setting up a cardboard presentation on the Trophy table. All three sylphs were on the table. Pet and Buttercup watched, while Annie was a bit more involved in directing the placement of the display.

The little kids were mostly gone, trooped out to the sack race for their age group. The teens spread out among the chairs.

Ray moved to stand a few feet away from Denise and loudly asked, “What are you doing?”

“It’s in the schedule of events, Ray,” Denise replied.

“What’s in the schedule?” He looked around the seats. One of his cousins was sitting hear him. “Mary, what’s on the schedule?”

“It says ‘Sylph Encounter, Ray,” she replied with a shrug. “I don’t know what that means, but it says the suggested age group is teenagers.”

“Sylph Encounter?” he repeated. He turned to the table. “I assume this is Annie’s idea?”

“Why do you always blame me, Ray!?!” she shouted back. She was still wired for sound and her voice came from speakers in the front and back of the tent. The teens and a few adults sprinkled through the crowd all laughed at her response.

“I wasn’t blaming,” Ray said after the laughter faded. “Not until I know what the Sylph Encounter actually IS.”

“Oh!” Denise yelped in surprise and tugged a cord. Sheets of butcher paper covering the display fell away to reveal a painted sign saying ‘Kissing Booth.’

“What?!” Ray outraged.

“Calm down, Ray,” Annie said. “We’re not seducing them. We just figure some people are curious about what it’s like to kiss a sylph. So we’re here.”

“And so are we!” Ray’s second cousin, John, said enthusiastically.

“This isn’t West Virginia!” Ray protested. “We don’t go to family reunions to cruise chicks!” He looked at the sign. “And certainly not for five dollars!” Giggles sounded in the crowd.

“That’s just a suggested donation!” Annie replied.

“Donation for what?” Ray asked.

“The… International… Emergency… Chocolate Fund,” Annie said haltingly, as if she was thinking it up on the spot. The audience laughed again. Ray noticed that Annie got more and bigger laughs than he did. But he’d written most of these lines, so he was still quite pleased.

“What’s international about it?” Ray asked.

“Cadbury, Lindt, the imports,” Annie replied.

“No,” he said.

“Awwww!” the audience protested.

“No, we’re not going to charge money for kissing our relatives,” Ray said in a voice heavy with finality.

Annie stepped to the edge of the table and pulled a pair of sunglasses out of her pocket. They were for Barbies, not sylphs, so they were huge on her, but that just made it more visible to the viewers.

She held them in place and stared at Ray.

“Oh, man!” he spat. Then he turned and walked out of the tent. The audience gasped.

Annie smiled and put her sunglasses back in her pocket, turning to return to the other sylphs.

“Maybe he’s right,” Buttercup said. She was also wearing a mic and her voice was heard through the tent. “Five dollars is rather a lot, if it’s not for a real charity.”

“Chocolate is VERY real!” Annie insisted.

“But we can always get chocolate from your dad,” Pet said. “Uncle Victor’s a really soft touch, even when you’re in trouble with Ray, Victor’s there, solid as a vending machine refiller.”

“True,” Annie agreed. She waved at Denise. “Okay, Plan B!”

Denise pulled another cord. The $5 sign dropped to reveal a 25 cent price tag. And another cord was pulled to reveal a promise that financing was available.

The teens cheered.

Denise organized the line and laid down the rules. John was the first up. Annie introduced him to Denise and the sylphs. He smiled at Pet and Annie, but turned to Buttercup. “I, uh, I’ve always found you to be a very class act, Miss Buttercup.”

“Why, that’s a wonderful thought, John,” Buttercup smiled. She lifted her hands and the boy lifted her carefully to his face. She kissed him full on the lips, to the cheers of the audience. And the smiles of the sylphs.

The next three boys kissed Annie, then one of the girls kissed Pet.

Just then, Ray returned. “Okay, this has gone far enough!”

Annie shouted in wordless fury and put her glasses on once more. Ray spun and left.

The girl holding Pet put her down carefully. “What… How do you do that, Annie?” she asked.

Annie twirled the glasses by the temple tip. “It’s fairly obvious,” she said. “These are Ray-bans!”

There was a moment of silence before the groans. But the groans did come, and they did carry outside of the tent to where Ray stood, listening.



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